I'm a Vancouver Island based photographer. I photograph families, children, weddings... but mostly... I photograph love. I see it, I feel it, I photograph it, I love the process.... I love it all. I'm not panicked or stressed about creating the images, because I know that the energy the family creates itself will translate, if I'm open to receive it... catch it.
It's different in my own life. Or, it was different today in my own life.
Last year I caught a moment with Maisie in the fall leaves. It is one of my very favourite photos of her, and this year... I wanted to do something like the same. I got her dressed, saw the beautiful light outside and we set out with camera in hand. She was crabby. I could feel myself getting irritated that the photos I was trying to create weren't what was happening. Frank was barking and eating something strange in the field. Maisie was having a pout about no idea what, and I could feel a level of anxiety rising in my bones. I said something snappy to her and in that moment, I had a flash of insight.
I don't want to be the photo crazy mother forcing my child to be in the photos, and then getting mad at her when they weren't exactly as my painfully inspired self had in mind.... I briefly took a look at myself and realized that I may just be resembling a mother gone photo wild. I put my camera down, and played with my girl. We fished with a stick. She caught 5 salmon leaves and we ate them for lunch. We were sleeping beauty in the leaves kissing each other awake, and we chased the sunshine. Then, feeling more along the lines of a mother I was happy to be, I picked my camera back up and continued playing with my daughter, in the leaves stealing a few photo moments as we played. We were back on track.
I was happier, she was WAY happier and the photos, always tell the tale. I am so grateful, to be able to catch myself in an act that I'm not proud of... and do my best to change it. I'm a work in progress. Oprah quotes Maya Angelou often in saying "When we know better, we do better." It has turned into another unofficial mantra in my life.
So, as the leaves are swirling and fall is falling, I hope you (like me) don't get so caught up in trying to catch the beauty of fall... that you forget to see it's magic.